part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
