Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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