hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
More tranny stories later!
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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