You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
