whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
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