what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
