I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
sex in a hospital.. check
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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