we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Randomize
