at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
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