I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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