I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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