I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
