these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
My life is pants optional.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
