oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
