If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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