Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
