Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
