They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Damn victory sex feels great
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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