Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
