I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize