So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
