He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
