Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
