At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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