smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm at about main and main street
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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