I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
