i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
