you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
