After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
