Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
