Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
