thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize