She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
