How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
