Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
