HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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