508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
