She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
My Sexting was not on an AP level
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
