Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
