So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
