Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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