They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize