just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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