theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize