And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
