3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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