You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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