Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
