also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
