Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Randomize
